Now? Really? Ok, You’re the Boss!

Morning stretch before taking on the day.

As is typical with God (if there is a ‘typical’), He is pulling long-ago dreams from my past and dusting them off in my mind and heart.  Things that I thought were just pleasurable ‘oh-that-would-be-cool’ daydreams suddenly resurface, like the Son shining through the curtains after a long nights sleep.  There is almost always a whispery reminder from the universe’s Creator that He’s the one that gave those dreams to me in the first place.  But like everything in life, the timing is His.  Like a seed tucked carefully during planting season, the sun and rain of life doing what they do, God is now allowing that seed to sprout from the ground.

Decades ago, the Lord called me to the ministry.  Over those decades I’ve hit walls and the walls hit back.  I’ve faced battles ill-prepared and often found myself in spiritual triage.  I’d love to say my walk with the Lord has always been as an overachieving overcomer, however, the truth is I’ve found myself (more times than I’d like to admit) looking up from the dirt and asking my Father, “what happened?”  The key, though, was I always looked up to my Father.  He’s the one that gave me spiritual life through Christ.  He’s the one who put these dreams in my heart.  He’s the one who spoke to my heart as a teenager when my life was a chaotic, disaster of a mess with the devil stirring violently trying to break me before God could make me.

Romans 11:29 − For the gifts and the calling of God are irrevocable.

There have been so many times in my life that the Lord has re-spoken that verse into my mind and heart.  Honestly, only half the time did I even believe Him or the verse.  The King James translation uses the phrase ‘without repentance’ in place of irrevocable.  In other words, when God is involved, when He places gifts or a calling on your life, He does it intentionally.  He knows our last day from our first and all those days − good and bad − in between.

So many times I would have given up on me, but in His mercy, He forgave and restored.  In His grace, He placed things into my hands and mind that only He could.  And over the years I’ve learned those are really His and I gave them along with myself back to Him.  These dreams and visions I’ve had over the last thirty (thirty!?) years are His.  He gave them to me.  It has never been about me and that may be the toughest lesson of all.  It’s always been about Him.  For too many years I couldn’t see Him in the midst of them.  Too much me and not enough Him.  Oh, I gave Him credit, but with the subconscious underpinnings that He needed me in order to complete them.  HA!  How foolish and arrogant we often are.  How foolish I often am.  And still that verse would come back with an added personal touch.  “Rick, My gifts and callings for your life are irrevocable.”  It always seemed to be haunting and taunting.

I still don’t have life figured out.  But I know Who is my life and Who owns it.  I gave it to Him nearly 40 years ago.  In a quiet, messy bedroom, during the night hours, I crawled from my bed.  Nearly pushed to my knees by the beckoning of God that I was in desperate need of Him in my life.  This enormous, all-powerful, God of all the universe, came to me in my tiny bedroom to change my life forever.  It still amazes me.

John 6:44 − No one can come to Me unless the Father who sent Me draws him

I gave my life to Him that night.  I didn’t realize it then but know much more now that He wanted all of it.  Not just the portions I was willing to give, but also those portions I thought I could do on my own.  There is an old saying I’ve heard for years that if He isn’t Lord of all, He isn’t Lord at all.  The saying is nice, but a bit inaccurate because no one walks in complete and total obedience at all times.  I understand the meaning is to try and convey what the word ‘Lordship’ really means; He reigns completely and totally in our lives. But the truth is asking Jesus to be my Lord was the beginning of a relationship.  He’s King. No doubt about that.  I’m to yield to Him in obedience; no doubt about that either.  But I don’t follow Him because He’s a domineering, ogre-ish, demanding God, but because He’s a loving Father.  I get to have a relationship with the One who paid my sin debt and redeemed me from my worthless life of self and sin.  The longer I walk with Him, the more He changes me.  The more I know Him, the more He shows me areas that I had previously held or hidden as my own.  So Lordship in a broader sense is a continually growing into His grace with which I was saved.  Learning more about Him and allowing His freedom to move in my life is truly for my best and will also, always, benefit those in my life.

Galatians 2:20 − I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.

Over the years He’s pruned, cultivated, and in spite of what some may believe, matured me.  Am I walking perfectly now?  Hardly.  But my growth is continual as is His faithfulness.  And today I stand at the precipice of the rest of my life and the ministry He’s called me to.  I don’t have all the answers.  I’m not sure of all the steps along this path He’s placed before my wife and I.  But as the Lord has done my entire life, He’s calling me to trust Him and be willing to take that next step of faith. He’s looking for us to take that step in the same way He placed the gifts and callings − intentionally.

So we stand here, intentionally stepping out in faith at His leading and fully trusting He’s got this regardless of any steps or missteps that may lay ahead.  Jesus is Lord and I am His.

More news will follow in the coming weeks and months, but please keep us in your prayers as He awakens these long-ago dreams and is bringing them to pass.

− Pastor Rick